NFL Power Rankings After Two Chaotic Weeks

Postseason Rankings Return

SPEAKER_02 0:13

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it's missing the point, and this is the Power Ranking Show. The first postseason starting power ranking show, uh, because we couldn't do it last week, because unfortunately, Matt and I are slaves to capitalism, and that's our that's our forefathers' fault, quite honestly. Um chalk it up to yet another reason to live in a Marxist society. If we did, I could talk about the power rankings with my friends once a week, no problem. But uh unfortunately I had to make a commercial for a uh soulless corporate overlord, and Matt had to, I don't know, I assume uh defend an abusive ex-husband. I was I was gonna say steal a single mother's uh income, but hey, here you are. Uh just hoping karma's not a real thing, but hey, aren't we both?

Why Star Injuries Are Spiking

SPEAKER_02 1:03

We're gonna talk about everything that's happened over the last couple of weeks in the NFL, but I want to start the show today talking about what's probably the most prominent storyline that we've seen emerge over the last two weeks, Matt, which is injuries to high-profile players. Um I I think first of all, I'd like to say the last time we got on this show, you made a real strict point to tell me that Mike Tomlin was a bad coach. I think, or mid, I guess is what you would say. But I think we can agree he's a fantastic television personality.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

Man, I you know, I did not see this coming. I didn't see it coming. I didn't think it was gonna be a shining personality, but I can literally listen to that man talk all day.

SPEAKER_02 1:50

All day long. Um, well, great point that he made was uh a couple weeks ago was about the fact that nobody actually gets to hit anybody anymore in the preseason, and these preseasons seem to be even more pointless than perhaps they already were. So I guess to open the open the discussion here on missing the point on the power ranking show this week, I'd like to ask you, where do you stand on A, the preseason in general, B, how much it affects how many injuries we're seeing in the first few couple of weeks. I know you're not a doctor, but like you have a doctorate, so maybe you can uh maybe you can illuminate some something to the rest of the the peanut gallery here. But I I just want to know, what are we doing wrong to see all these high-profile guys going down? I mean, everybody's making fun of Caleb Williams, fine, but uh nobody wants to see Jackson Dart not playing. Like we want to see all these teams at their best, right? We want to see all these

Does The Preseason Still Matter

SPEAKER_02 2:45

players at their best. Yeah, that was a freak injury, that was a bad hit. Yeah, you know, Caleb's was non-contact, it could have happened anyway. I want to know what we can do to keep these fucking guys on the field so I don't have to watch Case Keenum throw the football for the Chicago Bears for much longer.

SPEAKER_00 2:59

Yeah, man. I you know, I well, let's just start off. Was Caleb is Caleb okay?

SPEAKER_02 3:04

I mean, last I heard, I mean, everyone has decided that he's absolutely fine and it didn't hurt at all, and he made it up. But uh last I heard it's week to week. It doesn't look like he's gonna play Monday against the Eagles. Yeah, it doesn't look like he's gonna play. So I don't know. Um, I think it probably felt worse than it actually was, which I think is a pretty known and recorded phenomenon. Um I think he probably worked incredibly hard in the offseason and was really looking forward to mounting like a great campaign this year, especially with Ben and all the weapons and the way that we've put the team together. And I I was certainly looking forward to it. So I think the thought that maybe his season was done was probably pretty terrifying. Um lot of latent uh homophobia and and and fear about uh about if you're gay or not coming out in the internet comments, like real worried about his fingernails, I guess. I don't know. Cool. I like I couldn't give a shit to be honest with you. But then again, I'm not worried I want to fuck a dude. So like fine, but I wonder uh I wonder, you know, does that does that stuff kind of factor in? Like, is that gonna mess with his head? And the same thing for for Dart and for Daniels, and and I mean just so many quarterbacks went down, dude.

SPEAKER_00 4:17

So me and you are both fans of Caleb Williams. I'm a huge fan of Caleb Williams. I think he plays the most exciting uh game of quarterback you can in today's modern NFL. And I just want to put this out here for every single person who called him a pussy or laughed at him for being emotional that he thought his season was over, or the fact that he got covered off the field. And everyone needs to hear this. There's a 99% chance Caleb Lewin would beat the fucking shit out of you half asleep with R's hair. He would beat you to the death of couch warriors or stop calling NFL players pussies. He got attacked a million times last year, and he stood up every time and put out a campaign that we all finished the season going, oh man, he was this close. So everyone really from the bottom of my heart shot the fuck up. Nobody wants to hear your couch position on him being on his uh his ability to be tough or not. Okay. Yeah, he got emotional. Who fucking who? Get over it. Um, I'm really glad he's not hurt. I'm really glad he's not severely injured.

SPEAKER_02 5:20

Yeah, I mean, I was I was um definitely gonna affect my bathing toaster when I thought uh when I thought that he was Achilles.

SPEAKER_00 5:30

The text message I got was well, that was fun while it lasted. Dave was in the top end.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

I was not in a good place when I thought it was his Achilles. Well, the thing about the Achilles is that's not season, that's career altering.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

You know, it literally changes the way that they process the game because that that fear never goes away.

SPEAKER_02 5:46

Yeah. Anyway, I'm glad he's all right. I I just I wonder what we can do to keep the commodities on the field that isn't like over protection rules and you know, not let them get sacked or whatever. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 5:59

Like I don't Isn't that what we were supposed to be doing right now? I thought we were told that if we sh if we took away the amount of games, we gave them more time on the practice field, that we were gonna see less injuries. It feels like, and I don't have stats to prove it, it feels like we're seeing more injuries right now. So I don't know what the answer is. I don't know if you if you extend training camp to get them more time in the actual facilities. I don't know if you take all the games away and just make it joint practices. I I really I wish I knew the answer, but I guess.

SPEAKER_02 6:26

I like that idea. I also had the idea of, and I know they're never gonna do this in a million years, completely unrealistic due to the revenue, but I had the idea of you go back to 16 games, but you make the final preseason game like a half a game, like you make it a tiebreaker game. So it's like who it like if you're down to a division winners with their same records, if one won their final preseason game and one didn't, then that gets you over the line. It's it's kind of NBA playing uh mid-season tournament thinking, but I think it might work. Um I don't I don't give a shit about the preseason. I'm probably never going to. I'm still uncomfortable with the 17-game season only because it took me so long to already have the math of everyone's records in my head. So now I have to add a game to that. I'm like, wait a second, it's not 11 and 5 anymore. I don't I don't understand. Uh my my gray matter had already hardened in that area, so I don't know. But yeah, I mean I appreciate your your staunch defense of Caleb Williams there. I personally don't give a shit what anyone has to say about him, and I find that to be such a luxury. A luxury I've never experienced. Like knowing your guy is good. Knowing your guy is good is a is a luxury I've never come across in my Chicago Bear quarterback watching life. Like I quite like it actually. I I think the the comments sections, he's Gen Z, man. Like, he's gonna be reading this shit, you know, and like I think I know what I know about him, and I honestly think he might throw for six touchdowns when he comes back. I don't think that's gonna be against the Eagles, but uh what what I like about it personally is that the guys I've watched play quarterback for the Chicago Bears don't get made fun of this virently because nobody was scared of them. And at the end of the day, is that a real gun?

SPEAKER_00 8:18

Uh no, it was used in it was used in a uh in an armed robbery though, so I kept it.

SPEAKER_02 8:25

Cool. Alright. Um turns out you can take evidence home. Um what was I saying anyway? Um, yes, I think that Caleb Williams is awesome, and I'm so fucking relieved that he's not hurt. I really was in a bad place when I thought it really, really was in a bad place, like spiritually.

SPEAKER_00 8:46

It hurts it hurt me to watch it happen. But I also think the thing that we have to consider is you know, you have to consider the the bottom line of the owners in this situation because Robert Kraft owes a lot of money to the IDF, so he has to make sure he's selling popcorn in August and in September and in October, because he can't be ruined Mackelmore's career if he's not doing that. So keep that in mind. Shout out McAllamore, shout out Sean Sharif, Udam.

Bears And Patriots Temperature Check

SPEAKER_02 9:10

Honestly, a fun thing, a fun thing that Bobby and I always used to do when we uh when we did the power ranking show together, because I was a Bears fan, still am. He is a Cowboys fan. Now he's a fan of like the pink monkeys that he sees floating in the sky or whatever is going on with him. But Cowboys and Bears, we would kind of do a little section where I would talk about my team and he would talk about his team before we launched into the greater pool, which is usually occurred because neither team was in the top 10 or honorable mentions a lot of the time. And uh that's probably not gonna be the case moving forward. But considering, spoiler alert, uh the Bears and the Patriots are right next to each other at 16 and 17 on your on your overall power rankings list. I mean, we might as well take the time to talk about it. I think we've had quite similar experiences this season, except what happened to you in game one happened to me in game two, uh, as far as like losing and really not looking good.

SPEAKER_00 10:01

Yeah, we should really clip my reaction to that, by the way. We should clip that.

SPEAKER_02 10:05

Sure. Um the and then obviously the reverse when we get back to to uh Chicago just stinking up the place against the Brian Flores' blitz, but now that's two teams that have done that, so I don't know how worried about that I actually am, especially interdivisionally, and really unfair in the Minnesota Vikings, by the way, to make you play two divisional opponents back to back to start your season. Like people care about them. Um the nice thing for me and for you, I would believe, is that I've already decided that my guys are good. I've already decided that Ben Johnson is a football psycho, he's gonna be awesome. I've already decided Caleb Williams is sick. I don't care that people are like mad that he was emotional, that he thought he might not play. What I will say for you is there's this scary win for uh season from hell possibility forming for you right now. I think the chain of events goes like this. And correct me if I'm wrong or tell me if I'm missing anything. It's Vrabel is the dominant NFL story of the summer with his affair with sports writer, journalist, uh, by the way, Marks, Diana Rossini. Absolutely would. I mean, it's a Monica Lewinsky situation, you know. Uh you give it a few weeks and all of a sudden everyone's like, eh, it's fine. Um, what it did do though was severely damage her reputation because of the sad reality that uh when women do something wrong, they get punished a lot harder for it. Then again, journalistic ethics. We're not getting into that right now.

SPEAKER_00 11:30

The fact of the matter is, side note, if I were a girl, Vrabel would so you know. Oh, Vrabel.

SPEAKER_02 11:36

Yeah, I could see that being your type for sure. You want to feel safe. You want to feel safe. You want to be helped, I want to be helped. You want to know that if something happened, like he would protect you. I get it. I understand. Safety is important. Safety is a human right, for God's sake. Uh, something everybody seems to generally agree with, except for Robert Kraft, it turns out. It turns out safety's a human right if you're anyone but a small brown baby in Gaza. So he was mad that Mac Lamore said what I would call the least inflammatory version of a speech about the worst atrocity occurring on the planet right now. And that's just that's not me saying that. That's the United Nations and the International Criminal Court. Here we are. The the the pendulum is swung, the culture is no longer shaming you for saying what's happening with your eyes. Here we are, except if you're Robert Kraft, like I said, he took a shockingly little amount of shit for uh the decisions that he made in order to kick McLamore off that tour. But it this is a sports podcast, and we're gonna talk about it, Matt. And I want you to have your platform, but I do want you to talk about it in the context of the year from hell, New England Patriots. Now, that being said, you also lost the Super Bowl, Super Bowl hangover. That happened before the whole Racini Vrabel thing, and the whole Robert Kraft is a um is a completely soulless monster thing.

SPEAKER_00 12:59

Zionist piece of shit.

SPEAKER_02 13:00

Go ahead. Now you're now you're in this position where you lost your first game, but you bounced back quite effectively, I thought. So tell me your overall feelings on the Patriots so far. You you have the floor.

SPEAKER_00 13:11

I'm pretty low. I'm pretty low. I I agree. Yeah, I thought I was gonna see a high-powered offense, and right now I'm seeing a lot of rocks in the in the head of Drake May. Bad decision making. Um, our our left tackles are right guard, that's a problem. Um is an issue.

SPEAKER_02 13:27

I think we should discuss that further, but it's so bad.

SPEAKER_00 13:30

They're so bad. I just really wanted to watch AJ Brown catch a lot of touchdown passes um because I I you know I've been trying to catch that Randy Moss first year uh feeling again for the my entire life. Uh I'm not gonna get that. That's fine. That's fine. Uh but uh man, I I I'm happy to watch the defense flying around the way they are. I am. It's just um beating up on Aaron Rodgers at 43 with a fake girlfriend doesn't feel uh like I'm watching a team that I want to play the Ravens. You know what I mean? And they're going to play the Ravens, and uh they're gonna play the Bills twice, and it just doesn't. I I like the thing I know the writing on the wall here, and I'm really gonna put a lot of chips in my bears basket because I think the Patriots are gonna break my heart again pretty severely. I think this is a team.

SPEAKER_01 14:13

What makes you say that? You were you were just you were just in a great place. You're you were you're a Super Bowl contender by by all by all checks and balances here.

SPEAKER_02 14:24

Like that, I don't understand what you mean. You have your franchise guy, you have a coach who's a proven commodity, there's a a myriad of great players on your team. I'm of the opinion, I don't think I'm saying a hot take here, I'm of the opinion that you have the best secondary player in the league right now on your team. Um, if I was gonna pick anybody to come and revitalize the bear secondary and I could have my choice contracts notwithstanding, I I would take Christian Gonzalez in a second. And the and the fact that uh you guys went up for negotiations with him, I thought you were about to do the dumbest thing of any team in a in a contract sense in in the in the offseason. So and you didn't. You just paid the guy, you paid your best defensive player, you paid your difference maker, you played who I would argue was the best performing player of the Super Bowl. I that's what I would say, despite the fact that they lost. And again, I don't think I'm saying any hot takes here, um, but I love a guy like that. And I and I I just don't see it this way. It's been two games, like you're such a f if if your power rankings are any indication, the the wild swings of of some of these positions, uh you're such an overreactor. Uh like it's it's the conversation's not gonna be off this in a couple of weeks, and you're still gonna win 10 games this season and have a chance in the playoffs. That's really all you need.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

Yeah, I wanted like 15. Um I'm just you know, I'm just really low on that AJ Brown injury.

SPEAKER_01 15:48

And uh how long five, six weeks?

SPEAKER_00 15:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:52

Yeah. Six weeks ago. You know what? He shouldn't have acted like such a bitch about it on the field if he wasn't gonna be done for the season. I gotta say, let's not let's not go throw an ouchie's around, okay?

SPEAKER_00 16:00

Let's not go throw an ouchies around. Um, it's just the offensive line I don't think is gonna hold up. I think that we're we're two injuries away from having one of the worst in the league. Um, I think Drake's showing a lot of really poor decision making early on. And it's he's young and it's early. Um I just you know, to start off as high as I did. It was a really steep fall, so I gotta climb back up, and they're not helping me really. But yeah, the defense looked good, I guess, against Aaron Rodgers.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

Wow. Um, I didn't know it was gonna be so depressing. You really haven't recovered from that H round injury. That's that's tough. Um I've done it. Okay. Well, I think it's time for us to take a little journey, a little, a little picnic basket into the forest that is the rest of the National Football League.

Tiers, Overreactions, And Early Movement

SPEAKER_02 16:47

You are so kind in making your full 32 power rankings list when you make it. Bobby the lazy son of a bitch, he only ever uh did the top ten and and and really never had to answer for his crimes.

SPEAKER_00 16:59

Well, in all fairness to me, there's only one person up here, so I've got some time to think.

SPEAKER_02 17:04

Um true. I mean, there's a lot of conversations to be had. So who has the time? Um I'm gonna break it up into tiers, and the very first uh I just think it makes it a little bit easier to digest because there's a lot of similarities in the teams in different places here. I do think there's people in positions that aren't they're not gonna be, or a couple I hope are not gonna be in in the positions that they are for the remainder of the season. I think there's still a lot of time to change. I think the first few games, you're gonna see a lot of movement, right? Because the NFL is an incredibly unpredictable sport. It's really hard to know who's gonna be really good and who's not. The chargers are a conversation I want to have in that vein. Um, I I really didn't think they were gonna just absolutely suck, and I'm really starting. I'm not 100% there. I'd say I'm nine, ninety percent there, nine out of ten there, that it might just be they might just not be good, that that Justin Herbert, I'm I might have liked him because he's in fact Jay Cutler, 2026. Like, I don't, I don't know. There's a there's a conversation we have, but first, we have to talk about the tier that I'm gonna call possible cross-offs from here uh moving forward into the rest of the season. I'm looking at the bottom of your list here, and I'm gonna take the Falcons, the Dolphins, the Commanders, and that's it. I think those are the three, the bottom three you have here, I think makes complete sense to me as a possible cross-off contender. And I honestly feel like we missed last week. And as a penance, I do think that we should probably put our flag on a crossoff team. A cross-off team for those who don't remember last season or the season before it is a team that we are personally guaranteeing is not gonna make the playoffs. We are personally guaranteeing it. It becomes a game where we'd like to have all the cross-offs crossed off before it's mathematically impossible. So we don't want to cheat towards the end, but oh my gosh, if we have to uncross off a team, the embarrassment is it's palpable. So there is actual stakes at failing at this. Now, unfortunately, I think I was probably much more reasonable about this in the past few years because I'm currently doing a podcast with a person who has encouraged me to do probably 12 of the 17 worst decisions I've made in my life have probably come through your encouragement since uh you know the the eighth grade. So I would love to know. You're welcome. So I would love to know, uh, Matt, would you like to really fight a corner on one of these three teams to go bye-bye? And I I I would just ask that it's not the commanders yet, because although Jaden Daniels went down, that's just gonna be a depressing cross-off, and and I think it's incredibly premature. We both have to agree, we both have to agree.

SPEAKER_00 19:48

Okay, fine. So, based on the fact that we've got Caleb and Drake in our corners, let's not cross off the commanders because I don't I think it's even that juju. Right? Exactly. Let's not piss off Jaden. Plus, I think Jaden's.

SPEAKER_02 20:02

I have been so nice about Drake May this entire fucking time. I've been nice about Caleb, man. It's a complete I think I can influence the karma play. I I'm getting that keeping together. Yep. There's something in there that that bonds them.

SPEAKER_00 20:16

I should we cross off two because now we're two weeks in.

SPEAKER_02 20:21

The Falcons can go. Falcons can go, dolphins can go. The Dolphins can go. They can both go. They can both go. We're crossing off the Falcons and the Dolphins.

Cross-Off Game And Miami Goodbye

SPEAKER_02 20:30

Let's talk about why. Um explain to me why. We know why the Miami Dolphins are crossed off because they they entered the season intentionally as a cross-off team. They've got more dead cap space than a guy with a hat too big on him uh has. It's terrible. It's a 10-gallon hat of dead cap space. And I don't think that that is a tenable situation, and thankfully, neither does the front office in Miami. Like they're doing a full reset. So, all things considered, I I don't really give a shit to talk about them for the rest of the season because they're not participating this season. You know, like they're they're on the fucking physically unable to perform list at this point. So it might be funny a couple of times, and they might earn some radio time if they win a game they shouldn't win, if they're in competition at the bottom, that would be funny. If uh if they perform hilariously bad, if someone drops a record amount of points on them, if they truly go 0 and 17. I don't know. Anything could happen.

SPEAKER_00 21:25

Right, but but interception, butt fumble, who knows?

SPEAKER_02 21:28

Something like crazy might happen. I'm not, it's not a cross-off of never being discussed, although that is a lot of the time what it means. It's a cross-off of playoff contention, and the Miami Dolphins are not a playoff team this year. So if you'd like to say anything to sign off on them for the for the season, barring any, like I said, newsworthy moments, please. Uh, but the floor is yours. If not, we'll move on to the Falcons.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

To the players and the fans, here's the good news you're already in golf weather, so go enjoy.

SPEAKER_02 21:54

That's nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, you know, I mean, there's the red zone. Has all this action going on from around the league. You don't need to just watch the Miami Dolphins on Channel 4 or whatever it is you do. But here we are. We're going to go talk about the Atlanta Falcons. What to be said, other than an NFC South team that I guess has never truly recovered from that game against New England. Like they've never really looked, like there seems to be some sort of like horrific culture change since then. Yeah. There's a quarterback disaster there, and I don't want to bring up a sensitive subject. All they do is turn the ball over. I don't think they have a terrible roster, but they look anemic on defense. Um, they've not had a single play in the red zone all season. Now that's only two games, but also that's two whole games. It really sort of depends how you look at it. Um their intended QB situation, obviously, was Michael Penix Jr. He's working back from the ACL. Tua got injured right away. What did you expect? Cooper Rush, I mean, what what are we doing here? Like it's literally the 229 passing yards, one touchdown, four picks through two games. Carolina, we will come on to talk about borderline and honorable mention with how they performed so far this year, despite uh one-on-one record. I don't think that was a factor here. I think anybody would have kicked their ass. Yeah. Um, I'm very confused because I do like, and I think you do too. Well, it's considering a game that has not been released yet, you you may you build a really fun narrative around Michael Penix Jr.

SPEAKER_00 23:37

Right.

SPEAKER_02 23:39

B J Jan's on everybody's fantasy team, probably went top three. Drake London is a f is a fan favorite. I really like him. Kyle Pitts, another nice offensive weapon. B Jan's the only reason they move at the ball at all. At all. This minus six turnover differential, it's it's shaping up like uh like a Jets-like record uh to be coming up. And it's not, we never took it away. It's maybe it might be we gave it away more than anybody else. So what is it with this Falcons team who who have players featured on fantasy teams around the league who who do exist in the zeitgeist of football at this point? And and yeah, their division is is turgid. So maybe there was a couple people saying they might actually do something this year, but I'm ready to overreact on these guys. I don't know. You feel me?

SPEAKER_00 24:20

Here's my position on it. They don't have a strong leader as a coach, they don't have a quarterback behind them. What's going to happen here is they're the locker room is gonna turn on them before Michael Panics can put them on the field in the position to win. The defense is gonna be exhausted, they're gonna start.

SPEAKER_02 24:35

That's tomorrow that that's happening, apparently, though.

SPEAKER_00 24:38

Yeah, we'll see.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

We'll see. He's still gotta go out there and do it. We can't cross them off yet.

SPEAKER_00 24:44

We're crossing them off. They're already off. Hear me out.

SPEAKER_02 24:47

No, I mean, yeah, no, no, no, no. It's like when you take your hand off the piece and chess, it's not until we record the show. All right, I'll let we release the show.

SPEAKER_00 24:53

All right, fine, then we gotta cross the Browns off then.

SPEAKER_02 24:58

Wow. Okay. Yeah. Jesus Christ, this is interesting. All right.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

30 allegations. See, that's that. 30 allegations for their quarterback. We can cross the Browns off.

SPEAKER_02 25:07

Why are they the 24th team? Why are they ahead of the Cardinals? They've got two talent on their roster.

SPEAKER_00 25:14

You need a quarterback. You can't win this league without a quarterback. You have to have a lot of things.

SPEAKER_02 25:18

We can still make trades. You can still make trades. You can go get Anthony Richardson. Oh, right.

SPEAKER_00 25:28

Yeah. Um that's fair.

SPEAKER_02 25:31

That's fair, fair point. Um, no, we're just gonna cross off the dolphins and be done with it. It's fine. It's our first cross-off. We shouldn't do two. I'm not a pussy. It's a long season, trust me. I've done this before.

SPEAKER_00 25:42

Okay, fine, fine, fine.

SPEAKER_02 25:44

Um so there you go. The possible cross-off list is done. I I mean, I guess the Browns might maybe could have made it, but you confuse me by putting

Falcons Spiral And Buccaneers Misfires

SPEAKER_02 25:51

them so high up. Um, I'd be interested to talk to you about the Buccaneers. Well, did you expect this coming in? How how big of a swing has this been in your in your power rankings so far? I I thought they were gonna be much better than being featured at 29th on your list.

SPEAKER_00 26:06

They lost their offensive leader and they look like it really bad. I mean, Baker's not up to stuff right now. And I don't know if it's the injury, if it's the OUI, I don't know if it's having another kid. I don't know what his deal is. Does not look like Baker last year that people were talking about a potential MVP run from.

SPEAKER_02 26:23

Something's up there. I mean bad.

SPEAKER_00 26:25

They lost their offensive leader.

SPEAKER_02 26:28

Yeah. Yeah. Losing losing to the Browns is bad news bears, dude. Yeah, uh, you you can't you can't be losing to the Cleveland Browns if you're if you're a Buccaneers team, everybody was tapping to make a playoff run. They're 0-2. They haven't been 0-2 since 2014. Did you know that? That's this is the first 0-2 start since that in 12 years, which is actually kind of shocking considering I never consider them that high like to achieve a stat like that. Um, Baker, like you said, he's got less than 400 yards in one uh passing TD through two games. Oh yeah, I kind of thought he was gonna go back. Like he'd go up against Cleveland and and and prove something. He looks uncomfortable in the system, he looks really hesitant in the pocket. He's trying to extend plays instead of getting the ball out. It's very like Caleb Williams year one kind of mistakes. Um, and the passing concepts seem complicated. They seem like they're not developing properly for him, and that sucks. They shot them their own dick off in week one. Um, they again, turnover differential, they're cough, they coughed the ball four times and gave Cincinnati point after point. You but you essentially help Cincinnati have a strong start to the season, which hasn't happened since the fucking Dust Bowl. And you're like you're doing everything you can to change the typical narrative around the Bengals. And against Cleveland, they didn't cough the ball up as many times, but they can't finish drives. Uh they they can't. I've seen this in Bears teams, I've more rarely seen this in in Pats teams. Getting there and not being able to get the job done, you know, a little, a little like you know, you're fucking, but you're just you're not gonna come. Like you had too many whiskeys. Like there's nothing, you there's nothing you can do, babe. Like, uh, we just gotta call it a night if we're both good here.

SPEAKER_00 28:14

You always regret that last line, don't you?

SPEAKER_02 28:16

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's that's that's the way it is. Now, Buck Irving, uh the defense held Cleveland, but like I feel like me and a few of my friends might be able to do that. Atlanta is fundamentally dysfunctional. Tampa looks like they're playing bad situational football. I'm not ready to give up on this roster yet. It's only been two games. I think they're not devoid of talent, you know, like a point, a point you made uh about other teams earlier. They're just they kind of just look like they forgot how to win football games. And I I think if they could, it's stuff they can clean up. So I I don't think that they will languish down here at the bottom in 29 and your power rankings, but I'm not saying they don't deserve to be here for that reason. I if I had to raise either team, either Atlanta or or Tampa, I probably would pick Tampa.

Chargers Panic And Herbert Questions

SPEAKER_02 29:06

Um I'm ready now to have the conversation about the Chargers, a team that we both whiffed on. Uh we we agreed really hard in the preseason power ranking show that they were gonna show us something. We've always been Justin Herbert fans, the Harbaugh factor. There's been a myriad, there's a myriad of reasons to like that the Chargers. There's kind of the second team, the plucky underdog in LA, but it they're looking a little more clippers these days, and I don't understand what's happening. The McDaniel thing, you overpaid for him. I've always liked him. So again, I was high on the on the Chargers, and it doesn't look like he knows how to communicate with his quarterback at all. It doesn't look like he knows how to coach him at all. So far, so far. Um, Herbert Books fucking lost out there. Lost, man. There's a lot of really high round draft picks on that offense that's just not producing. So what the fuck is going on here in Los Angeles, man?

SPEAKER_00 29:58

Do I hear a bad stat? A really bad stat. They're the second team since the merger to be favored by six and a half points or more in each of their first two games and lose both games. The second team since the merger. That's not good. That means everyone was high on them, and everyone's confused if this is happening. So even Vegas. Vegas has even lost on them. So where's the problem? What's happening here?

SPEAKER_02 30:20

Yeah, something's broken there. I I don't know what's happening again uh to this to this fucking team. I guess my synopsis would would sort of uh land somewhere within I I mean if there's any sort of outrage that that they're sitting here at at 28, I understand. I mean, I think this is low, but I also think that I wasn't I wasn't shocked shocked when I saw it at first because this is this is bad. I mean, it's been a fucking mess. They they brought Mike McDonald to replace the last guy to modernize the offense because it looks slow, and his name was Greg Roman. And the the 11 and 6 record last year going into losing to fucking Arizona, who again we could talk about them, like they're the maybe bad to good team this year. We we could see they they've basically had the opposite trajectory of the of the Chargers. But Herbert's lines are bad, man. You know, two TDs, three picks, 401 yards total. He's been sacked six times against uh I keep calling him Oakland, but against Las Vegas, he was pressured on most of his dropbacks. The line is bad, and it doesn't look like they're it's a it's a personnel issue. It looks like they don't understand their blocking schemes, which is a really bad sign. I mean, I I think you can fix that as the year goes on, but like you gotta hurry up. It's very Cincinnati Bengals at the start of every season, they just don't look ready. So, you know, maybe, maybe we see something.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

It looks like a playoff roster. It looks like a playoff roster.

SPEAKER_02 31:48

You can't point to the guy who's got so many early round draft picks in there, you know. I mean, it's a real thing. Um, Herbert's is he just bad?

SPEAKER_00 31:57

No, I don't I don't think he's bad. I think he doesn't have the right coach behind him making an offense, and I think he's not being blocked for properly. And I think it's a little bit of everything that's going wrong for them right now. It's still a great roster. I still expect them. They I would not cross them off the list five weeks from now if they were 0-5. So I still think that they're dangerous, and I think their division allows for it. Um it's just man, this is not this is a historically bad start.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

All right. A quick, a quick devil's advocate. And Joku's out, Fibula, uh, Charlie Kohl Kohler had surgery. They have a left guard that's out, they have a nose tackle that's out. He's gonna miss some time, it looks like. Yep. Um, uh Rashawn Slater, groin injury, Pipkins, Lamakonke is coming back from that rib issue. That's something. I don't know how much you rate him, but those first two losses were supposed to be easy points in the schedule. And I and I it's it's bad. It's it's contextually quite bad. They're about to go play Buffalo, Seattle, Denver, Kansas City, LA, and Houston. In that order. Like, that's a very, very real, very, very real 0-8. That's that's a fully possible 0-8 Chargers season. I don't think it'll happen, but they could have been, you know, with a schedule that tough, if they came out of their first eight games, four and four, everybody would have been like, that's the strongest four and four team we have. Because they, yeah, they had two of the two of the four teams they beat, but they beat two of the six toughest teams in the in the league. If they if they take two games from any of Buffalo, Seattle, Denver, Kansas City, Rams, or or Houston, those are two, you've seen something in those games, you know? Yep, that's true. Now, and that remains true. That remains true. If they make a good account of themselves over the next six games, this conversation is moot, it's dull and void, it's it's in the ether, it's fugazi, but I don't think they're gonna is the problem. So I I don't mean to be immediately out on a team I had I was high on preseason, but damn, I'm I am worried though.

Packers Drop And Bounce-Back Picks

SPEAKER_02 34:11

Um J-E-T-S, Jets, Jess, Jets, Titans, Cardinals, Browns, Colts. Yeah, we're getting into this middle-of-the-pack scenario here, but the thing that really jumps out at me, Matt, is that last week I named less than 21 teams that I would have ahead of the Green Bay, or 20 teams that I would have ahead of the Green Bay Packers. And now here they sit at 21 in your power rankings. So it sounds like you've come around on the frailty mentally of the Green Bay Packers, of the how little we actually support Matt LaFleur. We're out on this offensive coach and his terrible decision making. The the terrible omen that is the referee getting on the stadium mic and saying they're gonna take the points off the board, which was uh hilarious uh to take that tone while announcing the role. Like even the ref was like, I don't know what the fuck they're doing. Fail at converting it on fourth down and then proceed to give up an embarrassing comeback against the Minnesota Vikings. Um, yeah, I don't know. I don't know if they are better than a few of these teams that are in here now that I'm looking at it. This might seem incredibly unfair to the folks at home, but I don't know. Is it completely beyond the realm of possibility for the the LA Chargers to turn around and beat the Green Bay Packers next week if they if they if they so could if they were playing? Um don't the don't the Packers have the Thursday night game? I believe that they do. They do. So either we're gonna see them again really, really soon. Oh, they're playing the Falcons, another team we just talked about. The Thursday night game. If the Packers lose to the Falcons, I am going to shit on them so fucking hard. It's also a single possibility, Matt. It's it's a real thing. Um what made you drop these fuckers all the way down to here? Give it, give me, give me a few seconds on it.

SPEAKER_00 36:02

Because the okay, so the Jets earn their spot over the bottom teams because they're at least playing, they're winning the way I would expect a rebuild team to play. They're playing dirty, they're keeping teams in their uh mindset, trench warfare there. The Packers are even missing out on Park Parsons and Jacobs, should not be in a dogfight with a team like the Jets, who's uh massively undertalented compared to them. I don't care what your offensive tackle situation is. The Packers should be handling that team every time they play them. And that didn't happen here. It took them to overtime Minnesota. Really, really, that was an embarrassing loss. This team looks lost without Jacobs and Parsons right now, but uh they are without Jacobs and Parsons, your two best players. So I have to give them at least that deference there that if they when they get those players back, this team becomes formidable again, at least they could become formidable again. Again, easily a team that could drop the ball here and and lose the locker room, and that would be the end of their season. If they lose this week, I don't care that you don't have Josh Jacobs. If you lose to the Falcons with that quarterback situation, you're in big, big trouble.

SPEAKER_02 37:12

I'm gonna call that tier like, oh, we might be worried. They should be worried. And uh, and there's a few teams in there that I think at least one of the teams we've just talked about in the last few minutes is gonna bounce back. It's gonna have a bounce back season. I'm not sure who that would be. If you were to guess, between the ones that with a with possibilities, I I'd say the Falcons are a possibility. I'd say the commanders are a possibility. How bad is Jaden Daniels' injury? I don't think we know yet, but it didn't look good. It sure didn't. He looks kind of frail. Um, I guess I'm still gonna say maybe, you know, maybe we get good news. Hopefully we get good news. Buccaneers, it could turn around, chargers, it could turn around Jets, they look a little friskier than I thought. Of I'd say from looking at your list, Steelers on down. Which one of these teams do you think could actually have a real bounce back situation occur if you had to throw your lot behind anybody? Packers. Yeah, it's probably true. I mean, it's probably true. I I'm I I I have fun with my aggressive bias, but yeah, they're they're easily the most likely team to actually bounce back and start to have a good season. Or if you're talking about a team like the Cardinals, maybe actually sustain. I don't think they're gonna though. I still ownership problem. Yeah, I mean, I think it's been fun, but I do want to give them a couple of minutes because honestly, they're at this point they're a winning

Cardinals Red Flags And Panthers Surprise

SPEAKER_02 38:28

team. So they deserve to be talked about, but I also at the same time understand why they're in this 20 plus tier that we're discussing at the moment. So um yeah, I mean they got absolutely fucking rocked by Seattle. Like that's but that's I don't think there's anything wrong with that necessarily. They looked a little frisky, they didn't look terrible. Oh I thought week one was legitimately impressive. How impressive will probably be directly determined by what the Charger season looks like over the next few games or or many games, depending all things considered. The Marvin Harrison Jr. thing is an issue. Um, I don't know if he's uh good. What the fuck? What do you think is going on there? Uh I don't know. One catch for 33 yards through through two games. That is staggering. Um he's not getting open.

SPEAKER_00 39:17

He's a big boy. He's not getting the space he needs, he's not getting the looks either. That's you know, obviously. But man, he's he was uh he was slated high. They were saying Julio Jones. They were saying like like we're gonna see glimpses of DK Metcalf here. I'm not seeing glimpses of shit.

SPEAKER_02 39:33

Yeah, yeah. That's tough. Maybe they'll get him going, but maybe I mean defensively, I wouldn't panic. They they had Seattle held to seven points at the half, which I think a game and a half from that that that defense, that overall perfor game and a half performance, pretty fucking good. They were playing the champions. There's really nothing you can do about that. They're a definitive top two team, which however you slice it, probably number one right now. If you if you really think about it, it's between them and the Bills. They're not broken, they're not dysfunctional at that point, I don't think, but I don't know if they have enough juice. I just don't know if they have enough juice to sustain. I think that they have some some players that want to win, and I think that's cool. I just I mean, it's a problem. They're about to play San Francisco. You could really say whatever you wanted about them right now, and and it's gonna remain true for at least one more week, all things considered, with the San Francisco 49ers. What do you think?

SPEAKER_00 40:25

I yeah, no, I completely agree with him. I completely agree with him.

SPEAKER_02 40:28

All right. Uh, moving right along. How about them Panthers? Oh man, crazy.

SPEAKER_00 40:35

I was high on them at the beginning of the season, man. Were you? Yeah, kind of.

SPEAKER_02 40:38

What did we put him in our prediction show to remember? I'm sorry, right now, hold on. We had Bryce Young went out there, looked pretty fucking good against Caleb Williams in week one. That's a real thing. I get that they just played the Falcons in week two. That's not that doesn't really mean anything, but the offense was really good. And like, yeah, they didn't put up any fourth quarter points, but a large part of that fact is that they didn't have to. They're they're one and one, and they looked pretty good for the first three quarters against the Bears. They went into uh oh, so sorry. Um I got totally distracted. Um, they looked pretty good in it, like they put up 37 points in that first game. I think Bryce Young finally looks like the guy that they thought that they drafted. I really thought it was all over for him after that those first two seasons. I did not think he was gonna bounce back to this to this level. Tet looks good, Jalen Coker looks good, uh Legette looks good, Chuba Hubbard looks good, Darren Waller caught two fucking touchdown passes on Sunday. That's a pretty credible supporting cast to have around Bryce Young, and he seems really comfortable with his guys. He seems like he might actually, I mean, I think they could win nine games this year, especially in the division that they're in. They have an issue, they have a worrying issue on the defensive side of the ball. It's it's probably not as extreme as some of the sports media are making it out, but um despite some injury problems, is Bryce Young good? I guess is my question. Like this is what we talked about weekly in Cleveland. Are we starting sort of like, all right, all right, Bryce? Like, let's see.

SPEAKER_00 42:11

It's encouraging. That's what the word I would use. It's encouraging to watch him go right now. He's a little fella, he doesn't have a lot of support in his line. They look like they're ready to play. I love that.

SPEAKER_02 42:22

I feel really bad for the Giants, man. That's I mean, I don't agree with the guy's politics, but I never want to see a guy hurt. And I I think to go from the high that they had in week one, where they look like a genuine Harbaugh built battering ram, a team that had really bought in to what was being espoused in the culture all already, to see Dart get that injury and to hear that it is definitively season ending. I am my heart's broken for the New York football Giants. I mean, I really thought that I was it was the position I was in.

SPEAKER_00 42:53

Listen, they're in one of the most they're one of the most fun divisions in football to watch. It sucks for all of us. It's crazy, isn't it? I hate the Giants. I hate the Giants. It sucks for all of us. It's a better league when they're ground and pounding on Dallas and they're ready to play. This sucks. They still have a very talented roster.

SPEAKER_02 43:13

Yeah, let's see, I guess. It's just it's the same thing that happened to him last year, so I just feel kind of bad. I I thought that their issues this year were gonna be like Cam Scadaboo is gonna just piss John Harb off so much that he didn't use him as a weapon anymore. You know what I mean? Like I don't know. We'll see.

SPEAKER_00 43:27

Um you know, Jackson Dart did has a little bit of culpability here. Right before week one in an interview, you said, I don't know, it feels like every time I get hit, I end up in the tenth. Like, dude, don't put that in the ether. Have you not heard of the football gods? Don't say that out loud. What are you doing?

SPEAKER_02 43:42

I know you're tempting, you're tempting fate there for sure, for sure. We did the Bears and the Patriots already. Thank God.

SPEAKER_00 43:48

Um I don't want to talk about them.

SPEAKER_02 43:51

I mean, I'm I'm looking at the middle of your list here, and it looks it seems pretty reasonable, man. I I the Jags dropped quite a significant amount. Um The Ravens that this this tier is making me think the Saints are too high, but the the the this tier is making me think a little bit like we still don't really know anything. I mean, I know that's not great content, but we really still don't know anything. I'm looking at these teams and I kind of keep being like, mmm, wouldn't make it there's a few teams down the bottom that I would make a definitive call on either way. Now I'm in a position where I'm looking at these teams and I can't make a definitive call on them whatsoever. Like the Vikings are the front runners for the nobody wants to play them awards. Like they're they're easily the like, oh it's yeah, we might beat them, but God, it's gonna look so annoying. That seems to be the brand, yeah, and like that blitz is crazy. That seems to be the brand of football that they're producing, and I and I I have respect for it. Honestly, I've always liked Flores. I always thought he was a good defensive mind. Um, and I thought it was bullshit that he didn't have a job for a while, the NFL's racist.

SPEAKER_00 44:48

So Ryan Daybo.

SPEAKER_02 44:51

Yeah, it's that's bananas. Um, and you know who gave him his first uh job back when he was a praiah? Mike Tomlin. So just something to say there. Maybe maybe not such a bad guy after all. Maybe not God the shit. How's Aaron Rodgers doing watch this year? Yeah, that's gonna, they're gonna be a tough watch this year. How is that?

SPEAKER_00 45:07

How was she watching that? Tell me, tell me that work.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

How does that work? Um tears.

SPEAKER_00 45:15

Next time catch the tears for me, send them to me.

SPEAKER_02 45:17

I don't like I don't like when she's uh upset. I I don't like when she doesn't when she doesn't uh see her team win. But it's gonna be a long year, man. It's gonna be a little bit more.

SPEAKER_00 45:26

Yeah, I just want to let you know, I really do enjoy it when you watch Steelers lose. I'm sorry. So go on.

SPEAKER_02 45:32

I mean, she got to watch them win in Gillette in person because of you. I think you well, I think you secretly were like, oh, I would love to send them in here to watch the Steelers lose.

SPEAKER_03 45:40

Of course that's what I want to see.

SPEAKER_00 45:42

Of course that's what I want to see. It didn't go that way.

SPEAKER_02 45:46

That's funny. Um are there any really interesting teams to talk about?

The Murky Middle And Who’s Watchable

SPEAKER_00 45:51

No, I guess I I you could you could roast me for having the Texans up so high. That defense is scary. I don't care what anybody says. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna doubt them yet.

SPEAKER_02 46:00

Who?

SPEAKER_00 46:01

Texans. I have Texans at 11 at own two.

SPEAKER_02 46:04

Um I still have faith in them. Yep. I think I think CJ, I think CJ Strad's the issue.

SPEAKER_00 46:11

Oh, yeah, clearly. I was way too hot on him at the beginning of the season. That defense is scary, man. They fly around the field. I swear to you. The fastest defense I've ever seen.

SPEAKER_02 46:20

They're so fun to watch. It's it's really I whatever happens, they're gonna top the if we if we I should start doing uh watchables. I should start doing a TV power rankings. You do the if they're good, I'll do the the the top 10 at least um most watchable teams, and like I'm gonna watch the Texans every week. Like, I just am it's it's gonna be a lot of fun that defense.

SPEAKER_00 46:40

Up until up until now, I would have put the Giants on that list too.

SPEAKER_02 46:43

They're a fun offense to watch with the game. I would have put them up there too. I mean, the that battering ramp style is like a lot of fun. Like he really he really built a tough team in one offseason. I really like that. I I don't think they were not tough last year. I I just think that they were badly schemed. So I just I thought that this was gonna come together, like not this quickly, but then Dark got hurt, and it's like, damn, that sucks.

SPEAKER_00 47:05

Um it sucks so bad.

SPEAKER_02 47:07

Yeah, I mean they're in the perfect position at 11 because they really are like a true honorable mention. They they they're they're still thereabouts, as far as I'm concerned. Owen two doesn't concern me. And then that was the team I was looking at when I said, like, I still don't know. I I still don't want to make any definitive decisions on these teams right in this in this tier list. So yeah. Um, the Ravens, it's gonna be tough to talk about them because they sort of just look like the Ravens. Like, I think they're gonna be fine.

SPEAKER_00 47:32

I I don't get a new coach with a new scheme and it didn't seem like it.

SPEAKER_02 47:37

It's it seems like their last three coaches on top of each other's shoulders in a trench coat trying to get an Rated R movie. I mean, I for some reason.

SPEAKER_00 47:45

This is the thought that came into my head. You ever like been to like a like a new like swanky new restaurant and you look around and you're like, oh, this fucking place used to be an Applebee's? It's like that kind of feels like what it is. Like they just read it in Applebee's as something new, and it's still Applebee's.

SPEAKER_02 47:58

I don't want to eat an Applebee's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a dentist's office, and it was clearly a pizza hut. Like it was clear, it was it's the shape of the hut, you know, and you're like, okay, that's cool. Um, they're dangerous still. I mean, Lamar's dangerous, like, he's not not an MVP candidate still. Zay Flowers going down matters a lot, obviously. That sucks. Um, I don't think they should have put as many eggs in that basket as they did anyway, but something's off. Like something's kind of been off about this team, and I'm just concerned that I'm not gonna see anything change. Like, I was sad for them when I when I saw Zay Flowers leave the game, hamstring also. Um, but that puts Rashad Bateman as your primary receiver, and I just he was good. Don't get me wrong, he was good after that, but it's just that's come on, it's a different dimension without Zay Flowers. I know you still have the most dynamic guy behind the line of scrimmage, but there's a bunch of injuries, it's not just him. You know what it can't be losing in the scene.

SPEAKER_00 48:52

I I I'm sensitive because that with the way the internet's been hamstrings fucking suck to hurt, okay? So everyone shut the fuck up, okay? They do like pull your hamstring, go out, do some fucking calf curls, and tell me it doesn't hurt when your hamstring hurts. Everyone leave my guy. I'm gonna get Caleb Williams arm arm sleeves, I'm gonna get him for him.

SPEAKER_02 49:09

I know it sucks, and unfortunately, because of the attitudes of the guys, the rest of the guys on our podcast, um, I'm not I don't feel the same way about Drake Man. I'm gonna have to actually come for him as hard as possible over the course of the season. So uh that's just the way it is. Like we are now blood enemies. But um I but I again I do I want to invite that juju in. I don't know. Um I already stuck up for him on the podcast because I was scared of the juju, so it's like just sort of is what it is. Um the Jesse Mentor Doyle era has inherited Baltimore's sort of maddening habit of not of letting games get away that they're in control of. So I don't know. I I hope that that's not the case. I hope that it's not in the DNA.

SPEAKER_00 49:46

And that's our deep side on the Saints, but is Tyler Show good? That was impressive.

SPEAKER_02 49:53

I don't think so, but that would be a lot of fun if he was. Like it's it's kind of impressive. If he panned out, I would be pretty into that. Um it's very Saintsy. It's very it's very Saintsy that performance. I don't I don't think he's bad, not yet. I don't think we can.

SPEAKER_00 50:08

I mean it's Drew Breeze Saintsy. It's this is strange. Is it? Yeah, man. He drew breeze to come back against against I mean the Ravens, if the Ravens defense.

SPEAKER_02 50:20

We'll see. You know, I don't know. I don't know who these teams are yet. Like uh everybody sort of just looks like they looked last season.

SPEAKER_00 50:26

Um chat, there's a lot of game left.

SPEAKER_02 50:29

Yeah, I mean there really is. Like there's just too much, there's too much to to talk about. In fact, the most sure I am about stuff is actually more at the top of the table here. Uh the teams that I know are good and are gonna be there and talked about for the whole season. Some annoy me more than others. They're they're sitting pretty right at the top.

SPEAKER_00 50:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 50:49

I'm less sure about some and and and others. I mean, I mean the Eagles and the Jags being eight and nine on your list makes a ton of sense to me just because it's like again, they could sort of go either way. Like I the Eagles are just doing a new and interesting way to be sort of like hopeful that they're not going to be good. They're pretty annoying, but they still go 11 and 6 and they have a chance in the playoffs. Like, that's just like what the season's looking like to me already. So the AJ Brown loss is obviously big, but you know, Hurts isn't Hertz isn't the gro the, you know, I wouldn't put him top five as a QB, and and I I probably wouldn't put him, I probably wouldn't put him top eight, and and then you can sort of have a debate after that, but I do think he looks like a grown-up running the offense that he's been running for the last few seasons, and I do think that he's in charge of that offense, and I do think he's trusted completely by the organization, and I think that all really pans out, especially early in the season. Shoot. Um, the Bears are playing them on Monday, and we have to play them with fucking Case Keenum. It's it's tough to imagine the Bears going one and two to start the season. I really was high on them. Um, but I you know, I hope we can do something. I mean, Ben Johnson's a smart guy, and our we're run first offense anyway, but man, I don't know. I I I I don't want to be playing the Eagles right now, and that's what I'd say about the Eagles.

SPEAKER_00 52:04

And that's why they're on eight, because nobody wants to play the Eagles.

Rams Reload Mode Meets Broncos Test

SPEAKER_02 52:10

What's up with the Rams?

SPEAKER_00 52:12

Dude, the dude, so okay, they're you're without Miles Garrett, you're without Puka Nakua, and you still have Stafford and Devontae Adams. That's the problem. It's next man up there, and we saw it again, we saw it this week. 28 to 6. Like, come on. They're still good, they're still very talented without two of their best players. That's a problem.

SPEAKER_02 52:31

I guess. I mean, I knew that they weren't going to be as bad as they were in the first game because I think they kind of just threw that game away. Like they were like, whatever, it's so stupid. We have to go to Australia, we're just not going to do this correctly. Um kind of lame for like the people that are going. Um, they got fucking smoked by San Francisco, but that seems like that might be a recurring theme for a lot of teams. You know, that that loss looks that loss looks a lot better all of a sudden after week two. We'll come on to talk about them. But Monday night against the Giants, Stafford, still good, 22-31, 327 yards, four tutties. Rams put up 481 yards, 60 plays. That's eight yards a play, roughly. Kyron Williams, Blake Coram. I I've been waiting for Blake Coram to come good. I drafted him in fantasy two seasons ago, and that was early. That was way too early. Uh, but he's looking pretty good. He's a big fella. He's little, but he just he needs to do the common unguy thing. He just needs to be a guy who spells the dude in front of him every now and again. If you're in a correctly schemed running offense, it's fine. Um, speaking of their running offense, uh their passing offense featured Devontae Adams going fucking nuclear. Eight catches, 195, two tutties. He's 33 and he looked 23. He looked so fucking good. He was so he knows the offense.

SPEAKER_00 53:47

He looks like he knows the offense now.

SPEAKER_02 53:49

Great connection, two veteran guys. Honestly, fun to see. What I thought we'd see from week one, but it only took until week two. I think the interesting development though is their defense. Aaron Donald's back. His individual stat line wasn't bananas. Um, he only had one pressure, I think. Uh, a few tackles. But the Rams hit the presence, the aura matters. You have to scheme for him. There's no way around that. I'm curious what you do when you have to scheme for both of them. What do you do?

SPEAKER_00 54:18

What do you do with the two and the three hole or closed for you?

SPEAKER_02 54:20

Good luck. It's it's it's I'm I'm scared of them at full potential and full health, but I was also morbidly sort of curious as to what it was gonna look like, also. And I I don't I'm mad that I didn't really get to see that across uh the first game, at least, and only a little bit across the second game. It's gonna be scary. He's had knee surgery. I don't I don't know what the return timeline is for him, but if they can maintain a decent season and then add that kind of weapon back in, that's pretty fucking crazy. I think he's minimum eight weeks out, but yeah, and look, I'm not saying anything's definitive or proven here. I mean, Darkov injured on the first drive. You know, like that game could have gone very, very differently if that didn't happen. Puka is a huge question mark. Mental health, physical health. He's questionable for Denver. And I I don't know, he's questionable in uh in general. Like, I think there's something, there's something kind of up there. They're gonna go to Denver Sunday night. Denver are in a must-win position. They really are gonna need to have to to turn their season around. And um I don't know, I'm I'm not saying they're having a bad season by any stretch, but like that first game, they looked really, really, really bad. I think these are two teams that like kind of need to win this next game. And I and I'm really, really interested in the Sunday night football game. So we can talk about them sort of as a package. Who are you higher on? I mean, obviously you're higher on the Rams or the Broncos on your power rankings list, but overall, if you really had to stake your claim, think especially thinking about them playing each other in in in prime time, like where were you at the start of the season and where are you now?

SPEAKER_00 55:52

At the start of the season, I thought we were gonna see the Broncos maybe collapse a little bit under the pressure of not having a real quarterback. That clearly doesn't feel real, uh, especially after this week, because I was very high on Jacksonville um to start the season. But yeah, no, I I'm I'm not gonna take the Broncos there. Like I don't think I can. Can you?

SPEAKER_02 56:14

I think uh I think I thought uh I think I thought Bonex was better than he than he actually is.

SPEAKER_00 56:19

You think I thought he was gonna be worse than I think he's worse than he actually is.

SPEAKER_02 56:25

I mean he looked like himself again, uh uh thankfully. Uh 22 for 31, 288, one touchdown, he miserable opener, and then he turned that into a one-on-one.

SPEAKER_00 56:34

We kind of glossed over this, but Jacksonville's defense is shockingly underperformed. That's shockingly. Yeah, they're not great.

SPEAKER_02 56:40

They're not great. I thought they were gonna be really good. I thought that whole I thought that whole team was gonna be better than they are, but again, I I'm not ready to to make any differences on that team either. Yeah, a lot of game left. Um speaking of defenses though, the Denver defense is still really good. I I think they're really gonna make a lot of plays this year. I I am like to your point higher on the Texans still. We'll see how that goes as we as we go through the year. But um Trevor Lawrence threw a pick against that defense, and it didn't really feel like it was his fault. I mean, it wasn't a great draw, but I'm I'm sort of just like, I don't know, I think they're gonna get a lot of picks this year, so it's whatever.

SPEAKER_00 57:13

You don't have a big margin of error with them. That's the beautiful thing about their defense.

SPEAKER_02 57:16

Yeah, Denver's gotta get their running game going. I think that will, you know, I I don't think that they've been able to really do anything. They've they've they're a little anemic offensively in a way that I think a lot of untrained eyes are gonna blame Lawrence and and maybe start giving up on this on this system and this tandem. But I um I think that if they just get their run game going, they might actually be able to put something together. The other thing is Kansas City look a lot better than we thought they were gonna look. So, like that again, it's another situation where it's like that win, that loss for Denver is looking a little better every time Kansas City go out and perform like vintage Kansas City, right? So that's a real thing. Um Kenneth Walker, man.

SPEAKER_00 57:56

Jesus.

SPEAKER_02 57:58

They're playing each other, man. Like, this is great. It's good. We're gonna get our first true litmus test because these are two potentially good teams or potentially underperforming teams playing each other at the same time. And they both had week ones where it was, oh dear god, and week twos where it was, oh yeah, that's that's why I thought this team was gonna be good. And if it Denver beats the Rams convincingly, you know, you having them here at number six is gonna look a lot less aggressive, right? And vice versa. So I I don't know. I mean, I I think it's a game I'm circling. Uh I'm really interested in seeing this game out uh on on Sunday night. Um, great scheduling by the NFL, who honestly have historically never done anything wrong, either logistically or morally.

Chiefs Feel Inevitable Again

SPEAKER_02 58:36

So um here we are, and now we have to talk about the Kansas City Chiefs. We have to talk about the Kansas City Chiefs, and it's very upsetting. Um they look really good. I have a few things to say about the Colts and and some of their decision making down the stretch, but uh, can you talk to me about how scared you are uh of the Kansas City Chiefs?

SPEAKER_00 58:54

Yeah, I just you know it's one of those things. Me me and my old man were just talking about uh at the beginning of the season, and we were laughing about everyone talking about Mahomes being done. Because as a Brady fan, I know that there is no such thing as Mahomes being done. Patrick Mahomes, and we'll be done when Patrick Mahomes says he'll be done. The addition of Kenneth Walker gives Kansas City the most dynamic offense they've had since I can remember seeing them. I don't remember them having a uh was the last time a running back that was this good. I guess there was that time period right before Mahomes, but man, they look uh absolutely out of their minds. I and to me, it looks like they have one of the best free agent moves of the entire year, and Mahomes is alive, and Kelsey is alive, and his wife's cheering them on with billions of dollars up in the booth. I would I never counted the Chiefs out. I did have them low to start because you don't get them just on your world, but Mahomes is back and welcome. I don't know what y'all were thinking about.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:11

Okay, sorry. Um Yeah, I mean it is terrifying. It's terrifying to watch. I'm I'm a little annoyed about it, but at the same time, I'm like, uh, is there something that makes me feel a little bit more comfortable that they're good, you know, that they're they're maybe gonna become the yardstick again, the measuring, the measuring line against all others. I do think that they still have flaws in that team, but they really look prepared. They really look like they came in being like, oh, you thought you thought you could fucking play with us because of one bad season. I really like that. Um as a coaching, as a coaching and uh quarterback tandem specifically, um, I did not think Kelsey was gonna come in looking like this. I didn't know he had that dog in him. If if that was me, you couldn't even get me on the phone. Never never mind on a fucking on a fucking football field. So you got that dog in him.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:56

We have this unique perspective because we know from watching the UFC that hungry dogs run faster. The hungrier boy out there that's been through the rough time is gonna fight harder almost every single time. Unfortunately for the world, and people might not get this reference, uh, Travis Kelsey appears to be more like Armand Saruki and where he can be worth a billion dollars and still want to kill you for the love of the game, and he's doing it.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:16

I know. That's crazy. Good for him, honestly. Um, he didn't want to go out like that. They went, they wanted him, they want him one last run. Um, they're actually closer to me. They're closer to the Golden State Warriors than they are to the New England Patriots. I think that that they that's the vibes they sort of give. I think Steph Mahomes give like generationally give like a very similar vibe to one another.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:36

Changing the game of the changing the way the offensive kind of rolling the West Coast for sure.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:40

So yeah, I mean, yeah, definitely changing how you how you play the game of football, like a lot of in a lot of ways. Um, from the sort of Tyree kill, we're just down the field, there's nothing you can do era to the you can't count us out, we can be system check down or dynamic and kill you era to the like we're never it turns out we're never gonna not be good era if we get to the Super Bowl. Padre Mahomes has a chance to beat you, you can't give him the ball, you know. Like, this is all true. Two minutes is two minutes too long. I'd like to point that out to Shane's fucking styking that pussy. So, like, I'm watching this um game Sunday night, and a great play. A great play by Jones. Makes a great pass, great catch. Guy stands up, gets the ball punched out, everyone thinks it's a fumble, and that's game over. It's ruled down by contact, which I'll be honest to me, it looked that it looked like there was contact while he was on the ground. We do like just on first watch, that was my instinct. I I said that I stuck to it. It was a lot lighter contact than I thought, than even I thought, because it was it to me, it was like not enough to overturn, honestly. Like not enough to overturn. However, if you do feel that way or you do feel it was completely unfair, whatever justice was eventually done, courtesy of Shane Steichen and his massive vagina, just deciding to run the ball twice, fuck up on third down, and then kick a fucking field goal to give of all people Patrick Mahomes a chance to beat him in in overtime. And I swear to God, there was nothing more likely in the whole wide world than death and taxes at that moment. Then Patrick Mahomes is going to come down the field and fucking beat you. He oh you gave Patrick Mahomes the ball when in a situation where he only needed to be in field goal range. You're a fucking idiot. They also have for better or for worse, I don't like the guy's politics either, but for better or for worse, they have the one of the best kickers in the game right now. You know, they have a distance boot. You think Pat Mahomes can't put Harrison Bucker in a fucking position to beat you when that's all he has to do to win? You're a fucking idiot. You have to grab the balls next time, Steikin. You just have to.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:50

Harrison Bucker from 45 yards out is gonna sit there knowing his wife is standing in front of the oven, baking him cookies, and hit that shot every fucking time. Every shit.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:05

And she's a lady, and she's standing on the sidelines with her headset on, and honestly, somebody should have listened to her. I bet she would have fucking gone for it on fourth down, you bitch. Um I really was annoyed by that because like it cemented a lot of narratives. It cemented a lot of narratives about the the uh Kansas City Chiefs. Man, you're gonna be a big thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:25

You have the Genghis at three, bro. Yeah, I do have the Bengals at three. Um uh I think that they have an MVP on their roster, and his name's Joe Burrow.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:33

And uh I guess finally the year that we don't just watch them mire an injury and and uh bad luck and and not put an offensive line in front of them. Or are you sure Houston's not just like not that good? He does. He does, but like Houston's good. We agree. Houston looks that defense is good, right? Does but but does the Cincinnati defense actually exist now? I mean the ceiling was obviously always really high with Burrow and Chase and Higgins and that era, whatever. The defensive improvement is genuinely real, like yeah, right. It's like we're gonna be able to do that. We're probably gonna see a 3-3 game against Pittsburgh next week, but like Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:12

You're probably right. But we we were just saying it about um about uh the Rams. What do you do? How do you close the box of linebackers when and you know we're not we're a vibes podcast, I know, but when Dexter Lawrence is shutting down your two and your three hole, and you can't drive the ball up the middle and get three yards, make space for the linebackers to back up, how do you get your first downs? And that's what they're challenging teams to do. Beat us, shorten the field. Yeah, sure, you're gonna get within field goal range, but you're not gonna score on us.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:39

I would be if I was if I was taking this from a gambling perspective, I would be extremely nervous about their offensive line playing the Pittsburgh Steelers, despite how bad the Pittsburgh Steelers have been. They still have a crazy good pass rush. So we'll see what this Bengals offensive line actually looks like. It'll tell us a lot about both teams.

Bengals Case Plus Bills Vs Seahawks

SPEAKER_02 1:05:55

Um Seahawks Bills are number one and number two, and I'll just do a brief. I think it's that way. Like for the foreseeable, I think it's going to be hard to knock them off that perch. What I will say is I believe the Bills were one last time we did this show and the Seahawks were two. I think there's going to be a lot of flipping back and forth because you know the nature of these teams, who they play, how they looked in those weeks. I still would say, just based on what I've seen over the first two weeks, like the Bills are the teams, the team that scares me the most. I know there's a lot of juju about like the Bills can't win. They're not winners. It's a cursed franchise. Like they are just meant to not get there and not and not do it. Josh Allen looks like the best player in football. And I think that there was I don't think there was that much argument of that last season during the regular season, but there was definitely some dissent. He looks fucking unbelievable. There's guys that are really unique athletes in the NFL. There's guys that are probably better pure quarterbacks in the NFL. Like I think I can name maybe two. One of them definitely being Patrick Mahomes, like the guy at the quarterback position, right? Uh who you who you have to bet your life on to win a game. Josh Allen looks like the best athlete that we have right now. Like he looks like the most fun sportsman to watch in the United States of America. And I'm proud of him for bagging that actress. And uh he just looks like he has a life that you could only dream of.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:19

He looks like he'd be a good guy to hang out with all the time, which I hate. I know. I bet he's really nice too. He's really nice. I wish you would be able to do that. I will say this. When it came down to it, why do I put the Seahawks first? First of all, I'm a big fan of the fact that if you're gonna if you're gonna take the belt, you have to take the belt. So you gotta beat the big three.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:35

If you want to beat champ, you gotta beat, yeah, if you want the belt, you gotta beat the fucking real thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:38

And the bills have allowed a lot of fucking points. And you can say whatever you want. We know it. Winning games by shootout is not sustainable into the cold months. It just doesn't it might be. They look really good.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:51

It might be for the first time. They look like they can fucking score points, dude.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:56

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:04

He's having fun out there, man. I do agree that it gets harder in the winter months, and I also agree that like in the playoffs, we've seen this dude come up short in the past, but it's hard to do. What we're asking him to do is hard to do. Not everybody can do it. With fucking Drake Maywood, but you know, whatever. Look, it's a useful comparison coming into week three because they both play teams we've already talked about with a little bit of length to it. Seattle is gonna go play Washington, Buffalo's gonna go play the Chargers at home. I would imagine I would say that the the Buffalo Bills have a harder game because of the where the Chargers season is. It's a big context issue for the Chargers as well. If they lose this game, like holy shit, they're getting written off. Like, I I think they could mathematically still come back, but I think everybody's completely out on them, even though it's Buffalo, and even though Buffalo looks like, at least for the first eight weeks, are gonna stomp fucking everybody. Stop Seattle going to play Washington. I mean, that's this is a good time to play Washington. They're probably absolutely disappointed. I don't know if it's gonna mean as much work on some trick plans, but let's actually see what they look like. Let's see what they legitimately look like against each team. Um, I think the Bills putting 36 points up on that Texans defense was so impressive. I think uh on the flip side, um, I mean, 31 41 points, 41 points against Detroit. That told me more about Detroit's defensive frailties, and I was pretty impressed with them able to stay being able to stay in the game and actually put up points when they looked like they were gonna get steamrolled like a few times. But Buffalo's average averaging 38 and a half points. Seattle beat New England in a game there where it seemed, and honestly, you guys had this game last year, so I wouldn't really worry about it. It was the very similar to the Steelers game. It just seemed like a game that was there for the Patriots to win, and they just wanted to do everything they possibly could not to. And I don't think that really bodes well for the team that actually won. Plus, they just played in the Super Bowl. There's a lot of unfair, we already talked about this, a lot of unfair sort of context to it, but I haven't seen Seattle actually tested in the same way this year. Oh, yeah. I think the complication, I agree with you, is the Buffalo defense. They've already surrendered. These are some pretty damning stats. They've already surrendered again. I just explained the context, so and I know there's a lot of game left. It's blah, blah, blah. They've surrendered 736 yards and 62 points versus Seattle's 428 and 27. That's an enormous difference. Um, that's a really big distinction. So I'm gonna frame it as if you're playing Seattle, what weakness are you attacking? They have an elite defense, JSN is still destroying people, they can run the ball. They're 2-0, 31-7 with their backup quarterback. I mean, this is a real thing. Buffalo is always gonna be able to say that's fine. We have Josh Allen. Like that's gonna remain the case as as time goes on. They're they are the best-looking offensive football. They're number one on the TV rankings. I hate to tell you everybody, they're absolutely number one with a bullet on the TV rankings. If they're not number one on the power rankings, and it's it's an important distinction. If you're doing power rankings, you should reward the entire roster, though. And I do think with everything we know right now, that's Seattle. I I don't think it's I don't think it's a terrible pick. Um This is how I got you to do all those bad things in life. We agree. I do I do agree. I fully agree. Um, I nothing about your power rankings uh truly offended me. I do think the Saints are a little high, but I guess they earned it, all things considered. And

Week Three Homework And Sign-Off

SPEAKER_02 1:11:27

there we are. We came, we saw we power ranked, we only crossed off one team, the Miami Dolphins. I think this was a lot of fun, but what ends up happening at the start of the year, Matt, is there's a lot of things you just don't know. So, what we're gonna do going into week three, me and you, our homework assignment, is we're gonna start digging into two things we notice about each team that we are now sort of starting to uh we're it's starting to crystallize what teams are worth talking about. And I and I think that's a really important distinction. So we'll talk about who's good on TV, we'll talk about who's good, period, and we're really gonna start to hone in on the thing that we think is gonna tank an upside and the thing we think is gonna put air in their wings.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:05

So I would say I would say 10 to 20 becomes very important.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:08

10 to 20, I think was the most important section tonight because of the fact that there's a lot of teams that they're gonna inevitably have to go up or down in the in that section. This top 10 is gonna change, but the top of the table is looking like it's gonna remain the top of the table. I guess there's one or two teams that might make a case to get up there. We're gonna have to see who that's gonna be. So for myself, DK Sizzle. For Matt, Will Cock. And for all you motherfuckers talking shit about my boy Caleb Williams. I just want to sample in cases on all you motherfuckers. King Kong ain't got nothing on me. This has been this.